Thanks guys!

As some of you might recall, I mentioned in passing earlier this fall that I am a huge Tennessee Titans fan (if you don't recall go find the post where I slam those bitches from DHL). Tennessee was in yet another rebuilding year this year and without long-time quarterback Steve McNair they started the season 0-5. But thanks to the magic that rookie QB Vince Young and (the best return man in football) CB Pacman Jones spun over the last several weeks, the Titans weren't officially eliminated from the playoffs until less than 2 hours ago...making this the longest into a season I've had something to really cheer for in football in a long time. I can't wait to see them get better next year.

Only one thing to say to Mr. Young: Its the big time now buddy, you don't cry when you lose a regular season game...or any game for that matter. Its like he had that saved up in case he lost either of the last two Rose Bowls (which, by the way, it is acceptable to cry after, but only if you're a senior) and felt he had to use it before he got too old.

Game Notes: New England Patriot Corey Dillon passed O.J. Simpson for 14th all-time in rushing in the game, and now he's the all-time leading rusher amoung guys who have also killed at least two people.

Password Recovery- The Ray Law Approach

Have you ever signed up for something on-line and been asked to provide a security question for yourself, in the case that you forget your username and/or password and someone has to verify that its really you? Usually, most places give you a choice from a drop-down menu. Stuff like: "What is your mother's maiden name?", "What street did you grow up on as a child", or "Name of your first pet?". Other sites let you design the question...these are my favourite. Here is a list of actual questions I have made up for myself over the past few months when signing up for various internet services:

1. What's that smell?
2. Do I look fat in this dress?
3. How do you spell relief, (be graphic)?
4. Where did you bury that dead hooker?
5. What was your blood-alcohol level during your last job interview (hint: flamable)?
6. What was/is your Mr. Mister fan club membership #?

The answers really drive home the humour. Unfortunately, I'm afraid they must remain with me before one of you breaks into my Wizards of the Coast account and downgrades my chainmail +3.

$126M Donut Eating Machine!

I was reading several comments left on a web forum today regarding Vernon Wells' (pictured to the left in the hat) new contract with the Toronto Blue Jays. Wells just signed a $126M, 7-Year contract extension to stay with the Jays, and canoe.ca decided to ask what people thought of it. "Was it worth it?" they asked.... and the barely literate readers of the various 'Sun' publications responded (this barely literate reader just read).

I got a kick out of the various people who brought up how outrageous it was for Wells to make this sort of money when people were starving...and how you could just walk down the streets of Toronto to find better uses for the money.

Let me help to point out the obvious to these people (which probably made up about half of the respondants by the way):

- Of course it is fucking obsence for someone to make $18M per annum

- Of course the world would have better uses for this type of money

- Of course doctors and teachers deserve to make more money than someone playing a game (especially my teahcer wife)

- Hey guess what? The money doesn't come from the government!

- Baseball, and all other sports are part of a free-market capitalist society. Owners spend money to make money.

If you don't understand the above facts, and can't accept this reasoning then there's a book by Engels and Marx you should probably take a gander at. And don't use a sports article to complain about the way our society works. The question, within its context, is not whether this one person is worth $126M, its whether this investment is worth it to this organization.

In the end I wouldn't pay $18M/year for a fat guy who has to hustle hard and dive just to make plays that a normal centre fielder could make without running (just look at the below picture of him taken this past Halloween) but hey, that's one of the reasons I don't own my own team. Can we buy ourselves a pitcher now please?

Go Jays Go!

Pictured here: Vernon Wells and Roy Halladay get ready for the Blue Jays' annual Halloween clubhouse bash (they're dressed as Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney)

Covered & Confused

I just want to make a statement that I think Disturbed's cover of the Genesis tune "Land of Confusion" might be one of the best covers I've heard in years. Here's why:

1. Although all Disturbed songs sound essentially the same, this cover actually stays loyal enough to the original to not be immediately written off as a novelty.

2. All Disturbed's songs sound essentially the same, so they stayed with that and actually made this song their own, and different enough to give it a purpose.

3. The original came out as a cry against anti-nuclear proliferation at the end of the cold war. It was a time when every citizen feared the power that the world's leaders had over them and what they might do with it. What better time to exhume this tune? The world's gone crazy again...just look at what is happening with Paris and Britany hanging out! Bottom line is that this is a timely and powerful song.

4. It reminds me of Genesis' original and the video for it...one of my all-time favourite videos

5. I'm drunk on scotch and will argue that Joan Rivers is one hot bitch with anyone who's willing.....

Is It Just Me....

...or does Nicole Richie make the sexiest celebrity mug shot ever? grrr baby...grrrrr....

Holy Crap! I'm A Road Hammer!!

See this guy on this post? For those of you who don't know me, this guy looks EXACTLY like me!!!...except I don't have a full beard and long hair....and I just started carrying a guitar around with my all the time today...after I saw the picture.

This is really a fellow by the name of Jason McCoy. He's the 2006 CMA Global Artist Award winner and currently tours with his band The Road Hammers.

Hansome fellow!

What's Wrong With Saturdays?

I downloaded some site visit stats from the Google Adsense dashboard today and after examining them I came to the following conclusions (can you tell that I'm a professional accounant?):

- Visitors aparently hate me on Saturdays (or perhaps just have better things to do). You would think that web traffic through this site would be fairly equal across all days of the week...maybe slightly higher during weekdays, when people are bored and at work. However, Saturday, specifically, is my slowest day...of the 15 lowest daily visist totals (all 1 visit in the day), 8 of them were on a Saturday.

- The most popular day for visiting this blog is on Friday!

- Based on the amount of posts I have in each month, I have determined that site visits spike when I actually post more...go figure!! Most of my site hits have come in the past 3 months, when I have made an effort to post 9-10 times a month.

- Site visits in the last 3 months are about 10x what they were in my first 3 months (meaning I genrally re-read my posts 6 times a day now instead of just once like I used to).

- I really need a new hobby!

Hyperlink Mayhem!

I switched to a new version of Blogger, because they kept telling me it would be better. Now I can't add pictures or hyperlinks. I'm about to hyper-lose-it on these hyper-whores!! Sweet hyper-fuckin'-shit!!!!

What Do Santa's Ass and Stephane Dion Have In Common?

...they're both featured in my "Lots of Nothing Post":

* Stephane Dion just won the Liberal leadership race. A pleasant surprise, and probably a great thing for the Liberals. Ignatief and Rae would have been easy targets for the conservatives and already carry some baggage with them. For instance, I heard they were caught humping in the bathroom last night after their final speeches. (originally written on Saturday, however they may have been doing it last night too.)

* The Maine Bureau of Liquor Enforcement, banned a beer called "Santa's Butt" because its label depicts ol' St. Nick chugging a mug of beer while going over his naughty/nice list. Last year the state of Connecticut did something similar to the same distributer for their "Seriously Bad Elf" ale. I think I will have to make a special trip south of the border before Xmas to get me some of these for collectors' items. Is this where the Maritime Brewing Company went? Oh Frosted Frog, where have you gone? **sniff sniff**

* I haven't downloaded a song in almost a month. I don't know what's wrong with me. Everything I listen to lately sounds drab and unoriginal. This usually signifies a switch back to hip hop listening for a while, but who knows. Maybe its time that I make that syntho-folk demo I've been promising myself and my fans for a while and finally show the world what's real!

* On another music note, check out The Killers' new holiday tune."A Great Big Sleigh". Good Stuff!..granted they could tape record themselves having a 5 minute long dump at this point and I would think it was musical genius...i think they're that damn good!

* Sometimes when I'm bored I stalk strangers I come across through various friend networks on Myspace. Its funny what some people will write for the whole world to see. Really personal juicy stuff, that no one should read except their closest friends. Funny thing is, I don't even have a MySpace account. God, i need life!

* So my hyperlink photo upload problem (see last post) is a very unique. Apparently, If I log right into the new Blogger Beta and start a post I don't have the ability to see the editing toolbar that allows me to do all this stuff. However, If I use the old login screen and get redirected to the new version, the toolbar appears. This makes me wish I had a nail gun pointed at my eye. Good times! Good Freakin' Times!