Nail Gun Producers of the World, I Challenge Thee...

Why can't you find a decent nail gun nowadays? I don't get it. Over the past couple of years or so, I remember reading at least two articles in the 'weird news' section of cnn.com about guys accidentally shooting themselves in the head/face with a nail gun and surviving. One guy shot himself about 10-12 times, piercing his brain, and the other shot himself in the roof of the mouth and didn't even know he did it until he went to the dentist a few days later complaining of a nagging tooth ache.

Today I go onto CNN...and lo' and behold, some 17 year-old kid shot himself in the heart.....with (you guessed it) a nail gun....and again, he survived.

So, I have a challenge to all you nail gun manufacturers out there: Make a better, deadlier product. I beg of you! Honestly, how can you sleep at night knowing that your products can't even take down these retards that keep shooting themselves in the face and heart??? If you need a test subject to try your tools on before they go back to market, I would suggest Eddie Van Halen. For the love of God, look at the guy (this post's picture, in case you didn't recognize the guitar god)...you would be doing him a big favour.

.....and speaking of retards..take a look at this article about a new invention to help people "Roll Up The Rim". Has it come to this? really??? Broken finger nails and teeth full of wads of wax???? Are you rolling up the rim of a coffee cup or getting funky in the S&M section of Madame Tussaud's??? For Christ's sake...if you honestly can't roll up the rim properly, or figure out how to do so without physical inconvenience, ask yourself this question: Have I used a nail gun in the past three days?